Tuesday, August 25, 2009


-my words (a lot of rambling and ranting followed by a lot of poems)
-my Zelda game (for PC, updated 12/23/08! HowHigh.qst + the program to run it)
-my images (scans of stuff I've collected and photos, mostly)
-my CD list (at the very end)

Hello. Happy August, y'all. Be brave. Play nice. Find balance.

I worry that many people do not know: right from wrong; what friends are; what health is; what is important in life; how to have fun. There will be a lot of ramblings in the paragraphs to come; good luck following along.

You have been warned.

The final entry (the post at the bottom of all of this) is my CD list. The stuff right before that is an archive of images from concerts (setlists, autographs, posters and pictures). All of the other following posts are poems, rants or gibberish (copyrights 1992-2007) that I wrote, many long ago, mostly about my favorite topics of society, politics, falling in love and getting my heart broken. Some of them I like, many of them I do not like (they are here because they exist); I started to compile the newer ones into one post for each month (....limits....). The dates above recent posts are accurate; the oldest ones... not so much. If you recognize yourself in them, thanks and sorry; I did or do love you. I would remove them if you tell me that they bother you (same with the pictures). If you want to quote or publish my arrangements of words somewhere else, contact me to get my permission. An exception to the permission rule is "Vic: Torie" -- feel free to use that anywhere.

I like words. Many pieces of music that feature lyrics grab my curiosity with the words. Music (without lyrics, as well) holds a special place in me. I sing and dance and bob and bop and bam. I listen. I hear. I share. Music is a way of communication. Maybe we know the song...

Here is a recommended listening list (just a reference point):
Alone -Pearl Jam
Animal -Pearl Jam
Anna Begins -Counting Crows
Another Roadside Tragedy -The Black Crowes
Bleed Together -Soundgarden
Bury My Heart -Tanya Donelly
Candy From A Stranger -Soul Asylum
Can't Hear 'Em -Izzy Stradlin
Can't Not -Alanis Morissette
Come Back -Pearl Jam
Crowded In The Wings -The Jayhawks
Deep -Pearl Jam
Don't Let Me Down -The Beatles
Don't Let Us Get Sick -Warren Zevon
Emergency -Super 400
Evil Eye -The Black Crowes
Feathers -The Black Crowes
Fell On Black Days -Soundgarden
Figurine -Warren Zevon
Flutter Girl -Chris Cornell
For My Next Trick I'll Need A Volunteer -Warren Zevon
Forty Or Fifty -Spin Doctors
Freeway Of The Plains -Spin Doctors
Genius -Warren Zevon
Girl -Pearl Jam
Goodnight Elisabeth -Counting Crows
Grievance -Pearl Jam
Guarded By Monkeys -Cracker
Hard To Imagine -Pearl Jam
Head Over Feet -Alanis Morissette
Hell Yeah -Dead Prez
Honey -Tori Amos
I Could Have Lied -Red Hot Chili Peppers
I Hear You Cry -The Jayhawks
I'll Be There -Golden Smog
I'll Sleep When I'm Dead -Warren Zevon
Indifference -Pearl Jam
Just Say You're Sorry -The Black Crowes
My Shit's Fucked Up -Warren Zevon
Mysteries Of The Unexplained -Tanya Donelly
Nine Eleven -Without
One-Eyed Black Dog Moses -The Jayhawks
Paint An 8 -The Black Crowes
Push Back Now -Super 400
Searching For Substance -Greyscale
Seminole Bingo -Warren Zevon
Smoke Signals -Marc Ford And The Sinners
Something I Can Never Have -Nine Inch Nails
Something In The Way -Nirvana
Spider In The Sugar Bowl -The Black Crowes
Standby -Super 400
State Of Love And Trust -Pearl Jam
Stir Crazy -The Madd Rapper
Sure Shot -Beastie Boys
Them Belly Full (But We Hungry) -Bob Marley
The Only Time -Nine Inch Nails
Three Little Birds -Bob Marley
Tied Up And Swallowed -The Black Crowes
Title Song -The Black Crowes
Train Song (Demise Of The Caboose) -Victoria Williams
Tuesday's Gone -Lynyrd Skynyrd
Voice Of Eujena -Brother Cane
When You Fall -Synj
With Teeth -Nine Inch Nails

Here is a recommended reading bibliography (I'm not much of a reader, but I find value in these):
Watership Down -Adams
Spoiling For A Fight; Third-Party Politics In America -Sifry
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy "trilogy" -Adams
Consuming Passions; The Anthropology Of Eating - Farb & Armelagos
Purity And Danger; An Analysis Of The Concepts Of Pollution And Taboo -Douglas
Crossing The Rubicon; The Decline Of The American Empire At The End Of The Age Of Oil -Ruppert.

I don't recommend paying for schooling. Visit your friends at college, copy their syllabi, buy the books and study alone or with friends after their classes. Some teachers/professors wouldn't notice if you bumrushed their classes (nearsighted people, like Robert J. Bartleson, come to mind). One of the most important lessons I learned in college is that debt sucks. If you just want to expand your mind (as I did) and don't intend to learn a trade, don't buy in. There is plenty of information out there, so much of it free.

The FDA is your enemy. They don't want you to be healthy. They want you to buy daily maintenance drugs. They don't allow the truth to be published about natural cures. If a company makes vitamin C chews and tells you the benefits of them without a ridiculous disclaimer, the FDA closes the company down at gunpoint. They make it very difficult for someone to stay well outside of the drug, doctor and dairy industries. There are very few drugs that don't have natural counterparts or dietary alterations that would achieve the same (more likely better) results. Ponder your scripts. Seek replacements in the holistic realm. Keep your oxygen clean.

Let's (all) go (back) to Amsterdam.

"Again, again!" He said with a grin.

Tim, Brett, Micah all got married (not to each other -- not that there's anything wrong with that...). Brian and April are married. Dan and Jill are getting married. I believe everyone should be able to get married. "Defense of Marriage Acts" are offensive. Gay people should be able to get married. I (I'm "straight") should be able to marry anyone I choose, so long as they feel reciprocally. If my male friend and I want to join our lives and finances and families, it is our human right to do so. Anyone want to debate this? Anyone want to debate animal rights?

It takes money to make money in our system of capitalism. I seem to be seriously lacking monetary power of late. If you feel like contributing funds to my wallet ($5would help!), please contact me (anonymously, if you'd prefer) for a mailing address. We live in a crazy world. It seems everyone wants power for their own ends. If I ruled the world, I'd make sure I did all I could toward harmony, science (for understanding and whole gains, not for personal/institutional "benefits"), love and knowledge. Why can't we all just get along?

Think about instant-runoff voting. We have not seen the last of the last ruling evil empire. How can the Bush twins support their father? Don't they understand that he and his cohorts are actively seeking way in which they can continue raping the planet at their direct peril? I guess immature victims often identify with their abuser. He obviously doesn't care for the future they must endure; I wouldn't be surprised if he sacrificed them in his overseas oil reserve projects just to prove he believes war is the answer to the world's many problems. Obama is a huge step in the right direction, but I fear it isn't enough to have a better President; there is a lot of changing to do. Please... no more wars abroad or at home. The wars on victimless "crimes" go on, but I haven't been arrested for crimes against myself for a few years. "This is illegal through an evil eye." -Evil Eye, Robinson

Guns, cars, capitalism enslave us, and religion can't save us, but action's contagious. Old white men selling out their children to bask in glorified filth is truly disgusting. Many people don't realize or don't care that their beliefs support many evils of racism, classism, capitalism and sexism; but even the disillusioned deserve peace and beauty in as many experiences as possible. Too many people in power just coast through the status quo without contemplation and that is dangerous. It has now been years since the murder of Victoria Snelgrove by Boston pigs. Beware the police; "less-lethal" weaponry can still be lethal. You have the right to be beaten until you remain silent (but only by officers of the law; consenting individuals may not engage in such activities free from punishment). Everybody should be free to control their demise. "The punchline is that you die." -Evil Eye, Robinson

"For a while there, I was afraid that there was no good music left in the world. How I wish it was 1993 again." -Dan; 8/2004

I want to get back to seeing shows as often as possible. The roads can be nice. Being on tour was one of the best experiences I've had. I guess I could explain here that I helped plan a Northeast tour for Marc Ford And The Sinners in the Fall of 2002 (9/27 through 10/6). I had a van with a couch in it then (I miss it; it was great being able to sleep almost anywhere) and I used it to bring the band and their gear to gigs. We stayed in hotels and partied. I even got paid. I would have done it for free. I got to video- and audio-record the shows and hang out and sing with the band before and after the shows. Too much fun, too much fun. Thanks Mark, Iggy, Johnny, Marc, Berry, Chris and Gootch (yes, that's what he goes by... Gootch). I have (relatively) recently seen Nine Inch Nails and Foo Fighters and The Black Crowes and Super 400 and Marc Ford and Blue Machine and Drive-By Truckers and Robert Randolph And The Family Band and Counting Crows and Less Than Jake and Mark Olson And Gary Louris and Soul Asylum.... Know of anything else I might enjoy?

We all make our own families from the people we choose to include in our days. I like to think I choose well. Prove me right! Dan's HERE! He's no longer stuck in the military. Why do our armed forces need to be outside of our borders? Why do humans need guns? Thanks must go out to our two-party system of government: congratulations on your failure to protect your friends, family and enemies alike from assault weapon violence and global war. 'Cause, yeah... more war and more guns with larger clips and faster rounds with surely save us all. "Guns only enslave you." -Evil Eye, Robinson

Like me, Dan is an atheist. I'm not sure that term technically applies to either of us (or anyone, really), but it serves well for descriptive purposes. If you are looking for intelligent conversation on life, the universe and everything, Harry Johnson (yes, I have a friend named "Harry Johnson") is an excellent conversationalist. If you want to talk about quarks and black holes, I suggest Jesse. Why is it still a big secret that most organized religions are fronts for corrupt power hierarchies disguised as moral oracles? How are we educated through a barrage of multimedia messages in this information age, yet still so ignorant as a global culture that we maintain the structures that become our graves as we are buried alive? It saddens me that both major political parties invoke gods of greed and deceit while masturbating into the open hands of lie-hungry lemmings (yes, I know lemmings aren't really suicidal). Religion is a crutch, but nobody wants to own up to personal or cultural weaknesses. "Jesus can't save you." -Evil Eye, Robinson

I consider veganism my religion, and some downfalls can exist in such a personal policy if it is not explicitly examined by the individual. I make every effort to live what I believe, but coexisting can be challenging when so many (a vast majority) disagree, ridicule, misunderstand. Medical options frustrate me. I had a medical plan from my previous job, and thus I was able to afford mainstream medicines. I have since signed up for MassHealth, but I'm concerned I may have to trade that plan in for something else when I move out of state (very soon). Vegan options in mainstream medicines are very limited. "It's Not Easy Bein' Green." -Frog

I would love to meet some kind and likeminded folk. Hopefully I will. Hopefully I won't be shy and neither will you. There are so many interesting people in this world. Our species is so lucky to be able to communicate and interact. But, there are way too many humans (and too many with bad habits that hurt) on this planet. That said, I'd like to have a human of my own. I think it is a great gift to have the chance to watch a being grow and learn. I would love to teach, but I would struggle to balance my beliefs with the demands on educators regarding the minds of others' children. We could easily reduce the population by having only one child each. We surely would have new, weird interactions with offspring (maybe more direct crime against youths, less indirect abuse of same) with such a concept, but we could move toward a more sustainable environment. Subsist, exist. "Well, excuse me for having enormous flaws that I don't work on!" -Simpson

Here are the results of a personality test I took:
Advanced Global Personality Test Results
Extraversion |||||||||||||||| 63%
Stability |||||||||||||| 60%
Orderliness |||||||||||| 46%
Accommodation |||||||||||| 50%
Interdependence |||||||||||||||| 63%
Intellectual |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Mystical |||||||||||| 43%
Artistic |||||||||||||||| 63%
Religious || 10%
Hedonism |||||||||||| 50%
Materialism |||||||||| 36%
Narcissism |||||||||||||| 56%
Adventurousness |||||||||||| 43%
Work ethic |||||| 23%
Self absorbed |||||||||||||||| 70%
Conflict seeking |||||||||||||| 56%
Need to dominate |||||||||||||||| 70%
Romantic |||||||||||||||| 70%
Avoidant |||||| 30%
Anti-authority |||||||||||||||| 70%
Wealth |||||| 30%
Dependency |||||||||| 36%
Change averse |||||||||||| 43%
Cautiousness |||||||||||||||| 63%
Individuality |||||||||||| 50%
Sexuality |||||||||||||| 56%
Peter pan complex |||||||||||||||||||| 83%
Physical security |||||||||| 36%
Physical Fitness |||||||||||||||| 70%
Histrionic |||||| 30%
Paranoia |||||||||||||| 56%
Vanity |||||||||||| 43%
Hypersensitivity |||||||||||| 50%
Female cliche |||||||||||| 43%

So... are you still with me? How did you get here? Do you know me? Did you follow a link? Did you run a search? Do we have similar interests (I continually rearrange my priorities: rock AND roll, sex, drugs)? Feel free to email me at trudatman [AT] fourwalledworld [DOT] net. I have a cellphone with the usual "free after nine and on weekends" deal Email me for the number.

I made a video game. Do you remember Zelda? It is based on the old 8-bit game, but I completely retooled it. I changed the graphics for the characters, environments, enemies and items (the rings are Giants caps, the letter is a jar of buds, the medicines are jars of kief, the bait is a gameboy, the whistle is a cellphone, the candles are lighters). My cat is named after the Zelda enemy "Zora." I made that character look like my girl kitty. The quest is hard. I recommend using a gamepad/controller to play it; it is very hard with the keyboard. To play it, you will need the following downloads:
A description of the game is here:
[I have started another quest, too. Hopefully I'll have some time to finish it up.]

I got a replacement Super Nintendo about two years ago. Since then, I've scored 111 goals in one game of NHL '94 and 109 in another and 102 in another. Holler if you are local and want to play. I'm also looking for somebody to play two-screen Command & Conquer on Gaystations. I have the link cable, the two consoles, controllers, two discs of the game (C&C:RA;R), two televisions, but only one of me. Also down for 2600, NES, Genesis, SNES, N64, PS2....

I have a large collection of live music. You can view my list in the last post. I am always open to trading. I have a lot of demos, b-sides, rarities and stuff that the list does not reflect, so feel free to ask me about what I've got that isn't listed. I am always looking for good (complete!) shows, especially soundboards. I have trading rules listed; read them.

Want to surf more? Try the following resources (if you want me to take down the address of your site, I will, just ask; I have done so by request and would do it again):


I THINK EVERY PERSON IN THE WORLD THAT REASONABLY UNDERSTANDS THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE SHOULD READ A CERTAIN BOOK AND VIEW A FEW VIDEOS ABOUT BRAINWASHING, CONSPIRACY, POWER, HEALTH, THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT, CORPORATE MONEY, TERRORISM, WAR, LIES AND TRUTH. Make a sandwich, pour a few shots of Everclear, pack a few bowls, find a comfortable chair and read "Crossing The Rubicon; The Decline Of The American Empire At The End Of The Age Of Oil" by Ruppert, and watch the following videos. If you are only going to do one thing for me, if you have any desire to know what is TRU in our world, give me two hours of your life... WATCH THIS:


That, above, is a movie which does a great job of summing up an intellectual view (truth) of religion and war and mind control and government and money and justice and freedom. Watch that one and if you have the time and the desire to "furthur" explore such issues, continue on with...

youtube.com/watch?v=FlazlamPCm4 [NEW - 2008]





Some of that last video may be a bit misguided, but with the guides only pointing East, that is to be expected. So much of it is real, but the whole "hole in the pentagon-shaped government building" bit was a bit overblown and confused (not confusing -- confused). The major point is: why be secretive (don't feed me that security line)? Because there are so many lies perpetuated and perpetrated by the powers that insist on stealing power; they want you to just agree with what they claim is true so they can make billions of dollars off of war and greed and power and oil and.... I am tempted to calm myself at this point, but that is part of the problem; those that question it all are often lazy or feel powerless to do anything. I know that part of what I can do is keep the discussion alive and bring these questions to the forefront. There are a few more sites that address some of the scientific proof of planned implosions in New York City and other points relative; check these, too:


The implosion theories in those videos make plenty of sense to people with backgrounds in physics. Scientists are important and the denial of science by religious fundamentalists is extremely dangerous. We, as individuals and a collective of concerned humans, need to start paying closer attention to the science of so-called "conspiracies." I suggest forming an understanding of the many ways we pollute our only planet. Our government(s) is (are) involved in a horrible litany of programs guised with a "fighting global warming" tag that is a misnomer at best. It may be hard to sift out the truth when there is no consensus and no simple way to see reality through the fog of lies. Some theories are not quite right, but they can show us elements within the biggest lie that we might not otherwise examine.

Please read:


See also:


If only we didn't live within capitalism, we could address lies/truth and war/peace without daily distractions. So much more to say... anyone care to chime in? Feel free to email me (titlesong [AT] gmail [DOT] com) with questions and comments; I enjoy honesty and discussion.

The following images are in a general chronological order. They reflect aspects of my life from the late 1970s forth. Image.

Garden Baby




Nice Shorts

Digging In The Driveway

Nice Vest


Medway Soccer

In My Tree



Skye On Tumble Down

Walking On Water


Kenji Posing


David's Feet

Benjamin And Daniel







Nobody In This Family

Grand Canyon

David, Gretchen And Stacy





Main Street


High School Golf Team

Sarah In Spain



Erica, Heather, Sarah, Michelle, Jennifer, Brooks, Peter And Spaniards


Jennifer, Daniel, Heather And Peter

Geek Squad

West Medway Spot






Peer Counselors

So, Hey, If You Happen To See...



Long Hair

Yearbook Photo




Lindsey And Paula

Noah, Jeff, Laurie, Heidi And Lindsey

Moms In Medway High


David And Dan

Now What?!

Ann And Valerie






Willard And Liza





The Cape

Sunshine, T-Rex And Moxie

Molly, Moxie, T-Rex, Sunshine, Alice, Splotchy And Zora

Berry And Marc

Marc In The Shirt I Made

Luda And Steph



Highland, Illinois, USA


Thunderstorm 6:54 P.M.



White Ladyslipper

Daniel And Daniel

Dog Island Flight School

Back To Dog Island

Edmund McGinty Durgin




Zora Ball




The Cat


Super 400 - 12/31/06

Super 400 - 1/1/07

Kenny Hohman

Joe Daley

Lori Friday

Lisa Lawrence

Moms In Delaware


Mini In A Mattress

Cactus Beverages And The Chaser


Loves Box


Daniel And Jillian

Nut And Bolt



Heated Tide Pool

Dan Submerged

Looks Deep

Push Me Pull Me


Basic Neck-Break Technique

Jillian Beneath

Did You See That Last One?

Hawai'ian Shadow


Do I Like Them Small And Easy?

A Safe Place

Dan In

The One That Won

Tsunami; Into The Water!

Here, Kitty

Nice Kitty

Likes Me


Adam's Bay

The Tailless Blur

I Think It's Love



Also Known As Necklace

Ab Hiding


With A Guard

New Castle





Lucy Loves Me



Beach Face


My New One-Inch Friend

Getting Used To The Beach Again


Spring Dark

Jupiter Loves Me

Good Swimming

Who's Next

Repping West Medway In Ashland

Well, folks... thanks for stopping in; I hope you are having fun.

Go vegan.

Prosecute Bush.

Practice love.

Efficient motor-vote green.

One love, positive effect, seek truth.

Whew; that was too much fun.

Again, again!